I got the most righteous comments. For some odd reason it was on a piece of artwork on my older blog posts — you know, where no one will ever see it. So now you’ll see it.
“kayin chats shit he is a theif i know the original creator of i wanna be the guy !! my mate jordan, he asked kayin along with others to help him and give them peices of raw data and kayin was one to help with the detailed animation. kayin ur a fukin theif !! u could never ever make anything tht good go fuk yourself !!”
Well you wanna know WHAT? Thats right I stole it! It’s all true! They trusted me to do IWBTG INNOVATED and HIGHLY DETAILED ANIMATIONS
You know. The ones that weren’t stolen from other games.
ALSO: I slept with Jordan’s mom. Thats right. I don’t even know if he knew that but when I was visiting England to discuss the design for the game, I saw a MILF and I just could not resist. I may have also inappropriately touched his little sister — but hey, me and his mom were drunk. Just comin’ clean here.
The story doesn’t stop there though. I might as well talk about the original intentions of the creator, Jordon. As a former French Native, the original name for the game was “Je Veux Etre L’Homme” and was originally not about 8-bit retro-ism (we were just bad at graphics) but instead the French theater and the misery it induces.
The kid was originally a young frenchman named “Le Garcon”, who had a fancy beret and threw croissants. Ultimately Danny convinced Jordan that this was really stereotypical… and also the croissants looked like turds. So we moved to a gun. On an interesting note, medium modes bow uses Jordan’s same exact code to follow the player as the beret did.
There was also a time when we fooled with having the game in Black and White to make it look more artistic. The ending also seemed to change whenever Jordan watched an M. Night Shyamalan movie. When I visited England and talked to him in detail about this, it was clear he was an art fag who didn’t want to make a real game. So I stole the goods, knowing that some stupid, artsy Frenchy would never finish the game before me! Also his mom had this hot cross between an English and French accent. I -HAD- to do it!
I doubt anyone blames me here. The game benefited immensely from it. Even the mom bagging part. You can all thank me later.
(… I guess you’re just not ‘famous’ until someone tries to take credit for your work)